| Revision as of 07:45, 11 December 2006 editCatherine de Burgh (talk | contribs)679 edits ←Created page with 'I represent decency on Misplaced Pages' | Revision as of 23:22, 27 September 2007 edit undo86.140.131.232 (talk) It is time I must tell Misplaced Pages the whole, sordid truth. I have been living a lie these many years.Next edit → | ||
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| I like to say that I represent decency on Misplaced Pages, but in truth I feel that I must confess that I possess an unrivalled collection of erotic drawings, most of which I posed for myself. Several involve contortions of a most awkward nature, and one depicts an activity hithertofore only attempted by the most flexible (and might I add inventive) of Indian yogi masters. It took several days of bed rest with a laudanum-soaked handkerchief and the tender ministrations of my maidservant Clarissa fully to recover from my exertions. | |||
| I represent decency on Misplaced Pages | |||
| My particular favourite drawing in the collection is the one entitled "The Wheelbarrow". Clearly a personage of my breeding and standing in society has no practical experience of a wheelbarrow or how one might manoeuvre such an appliance, but oft-times from my withdrawing room window I have viewed the under-gardeners at their toil, man-handling their equipment with gusto. It was with just such an underling (a coarse, rugged brute, but curiously appealing for all that) that I posed for said drawing. Mr Percival Fane, the noted artist, took great pains to scribe an accurate version of our conjunction. Sadly, I do not feel it yet possible to share the image with the world on this new-fangled Wonkypedia tennisnet technology, but one can only hope that one day the capability will be put in place, and that pictures as well as words will be available for all to share and peruse at their leisure. Until then, I must leave you with the mental picture of a fair English rose, a lady of exquisite taste and refinement, being most thoroughly | |||
Revision as of 23:22, 27 September 2007
I like to say that I represent decency on Misplaced Pages, but in truth I feel that I must confess that I possess an unrivalled collection of erotic drawings, most of which I posed for myself. Several involve contortions of a most awkward nature, and one depicts an activity hithertofore only attempted by the most flexible (and might I add inventive) of Indian yogi masters. It took several days of bed rest with a laudanum-soaked handkerchief and the tender ministrations of my maidservant Clarissa fully to recover from my exertions.
My particular favourite drawing in the collection is the one entitled "The Wheelbarrow". Clearly a personage of my breeding and standing in society has no practical experience of a wheelbarrow or how one might manoeuvre such an appliance, but oft-times from my withdrawing room window I have viewed the under-gardeners at their toil, man-handling their equipment with gusto. It was with just such an underling (a coarse, rugged brute, but curiously appealing for all that) that I posed for said drawing. Mr Percival Fane, the noted artist, took great pains to scribe an accurate version of our conjunction. Sadly, I do not feel it yet possible to share the image with the world on this new-fangled Wonkypedia tennisnet technology, but one can only hope that one day the capability will be put in place, and that pictures as well as words will be available for all to share and peruse at their leisure. Until then, I must leave you with the mental picture of a fair English rose, a lady of exquisite taste and refinement, being most thoroughly