Revision as of 02:47, 23 January 2013 view sourceBeeblebrox (talk | contribs)Autopatrolled, Administrators112,441 edits nutshell/note on how this often backfires due to prudery← Previous edit | Revision as of 18:44, 25 January 2014 view source Beeblebrox (talk | contribs)Autopatrolled, Administrators112,441 edits →That being said, don't do this: my spellchecker needs to fuck offNext edit → | ||
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{{user essay}} | {{user essay}} | ||
{{nutshell|I am usually a very nice person and I only get mean if I see no other way to get through to someone. . If I have told you to fuck off, you deserved it. }} | {{nutshell|I am usually a very nice person and I only get mean if I see no other way to get through to someone. . If I have told you to fuck off, you deserved it. On the other hand, this is probably bad advice and you shouldn't follow it if you want life to be easy.}} | ||
Once or twice in my wiki-career, I have told another user to fuck off. In each instance there have been several who felt the need to tell me what a bad idea that was, that it didn't help, that it was uncalled for, etc. I don't make a habit out of telling people to fuck off, I only do it when they've really ''earned it''. I deal with the real world, I don't live in the fantasy world some Wikipedians would have us believe in where no matter how ridiculous someone is acting we all have to talk like kindergarten teachers lest somebody be offended. In each case of me using this term the circumstances were as follows: | Once or twice in my wiki-career, I have told another user to fuck off. In each instance there have been several who felt the need to tell me what a bad idea that was, that it didn't help, that it was uncalled for, etc. I don't make a habit out of telling people to fuck off, I only do it when they've really ''earned it''. I deal with the real world, I don't live in the fantasy world some Wikipedians would have us believe in where no matter how ridiculous someone is acting we all have to talk like kindergarten teachers lest somebody be offended. In each case of me using this term the circumstances were as follows: | ||
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If that seems wrong to you, then you probably haven't worked a job where you deal with the general public. I have. Sometimes you have to tell somebody that they are too drunk, too loud, too angry, or whatever, and that they need to leave. Usually they feel suitably embarrassed and they do leave without any further fuss. Sometimes they would rather argue about it, embarrassing themselves even further with their inability to understand that they are acting like an ass. That is when it becomes appropriate to resort to using strong language. It has its place and purpose and anyone who thinks it absolutely never acceptable is free to not use it themselves but should not try and enforce that draconian prohibition on others or endlessly berate them when they do use it. | If that seems wrong to you, then you probably haven't worked a job where you deal with the general public. I have. Sometimes you have to tell somebody that they are too drunk, too loud, too angry, or whatever, and that they need to leave. Usually they feel suitably embarrassed and they do leave without any further fuss. Sometimes they would rather argue about it, embarrassing themselves even further with their inability to understand that they are acting like an ass. That is when it becomes appropriate to resort to using strong language. It has its place and purpose and anyone who thinks it absolutely never acceptable is free to not use it themselves but should not try and enforce that draconian prohibition on others or endlessly berate them when they do use it. | ||
==That being said, don't do this== | |||
(Be aware that nearly every time I do this it backfires on me and a user or two does in fact throw a big hissy fit about it, distracting attention from the jackass who would not stop posting to my talk page, so don't take this essay as indicating a best practice. I still think it is appropriate in the limited circumstances described here but the delicate flowers who police civility on Misplaced Pages do not agree and feel that swearing is ruder than not leaving when you've been asked.) | |||
I really believed in this for a long time. I still believe in the underlying principle, but let's face it: Misplaced Pages is not a bar, even if people do edit while drunk at three in the morning. What is entirely appropriate behavior in one context may (in this case absolutely will) be seen as entirely inappropriate in another context. Doing this will only change the focus on to you for daring to use a bad word. The persistent jerk who prompted you to say it will get to just walk away while everyone yells at you for telling them to fuck off. A better approach is to just remove the offending posts. If needed find an uninvolved admin to talk/warn/block them. | |||
So fuck of from fucking off, it just is not a good idea in this environment. | |||
{{civility}} | {{civility}} |
Revision as of 18:44, 25 January 2014
This is an essay. It contains the advice or opinions of one or more Misplaced Pages contributors. This page is not an encyclopedia article, nor is it one of Misplaced Pages's policies or guidelines, as it has not been thoroughly vetted by the community. Some essays represent widespread norms; others only represent minority viewpoints. |
This page in a nutshell: I am usually a very nice person and I only get mean if I see no other way to get through to someone. . If I have told you to fuck off, you deserved it. On the other hand, this is probably bad advice and you shouldn't follow it if you want life to be easy. |
Once or twice in my wiki-career, I have told another user to fuck off. In each instance there have been several who felt the need to tell me what a bad idea that was, that it didn't help, that it was uncalled for, etc. I don't make a habit out of telling people to fuck off, I only do it when they've really earned it. I deal with the real world, I don't live in the fantasy world some Wikipedians would have us believe in where no matter how ridiculous someone is acting we all have to talk like kindergarten teachers lest somebody be offended. In each case of me using this term the circumstances were as follows:
- The other user and I were in some sort of dispute
- I had tried to break off discussion with them as it was not working
- They persistently posted to my talk page after being asked nicely to stop doing so
- I told them to fuck off
If that seems wrong to you, then you probably haven't worked a job where you deal with the general public. I have. Sometimes you have to tell somebody that they are too drunk, too loud, too angry, or whatever, and that they need to leave. Usually they feel suitably embarrassed and they do leave without any further fuss. Sometimes they would rather argue about it, embarrassing themselves even further with their inability to understand that they are acting like an ass. That is when it becomes appropriate to resort to using strong language. It has its place and purpose and anyone who thinks it absolutely never acceptable is free to not use it themselves but should not try and enforce that draconian prohibition on others or endlessly berate them when they do use it.
That being said, don't do this
I really believed in this for a long time. I still believe in the underlying principle, but let's face it: Misplaced Pages is not a bar, even if people do edit while drunk at three in the morning. What is entirely appropriate behavior in one context may (in this case absolutely will) be seen as entirely inappropriate in another context. Doing this will only change the focus on to you for daring to use a bad word. The persistent jerk who prompted you to say it will get to just walk away while everyone yells at you for telling them to fuck off. A better approach is to just remove the offending posts. If needed find an uninvolved admin to talk/warn/block them.
So fuck of from fucking off, it just is not a good idea in this environment.