Misplaced Pages

Revision as of 07:40, 27 December 2013

This user participates in WikiProject Piracy.

This user fights in open resistance against the forces of the Vandals.

About the Cap'n

Born: 16 November, in the year of your Lord 1,982

Gender: Bucko

Nationality: American, but the good kind

Education: California State University Long Beach & CSU Hard Knocks

Marital Status: Blissful

Flag:

• Edward Teach "Blackbeard"

Proclivities: Swashing and/or buckling, running, jumping, climbing, speaking anachronistically, vomiting forth unwanted trivia and staring out at the sea with bittersweet tears. Aye, she be a cold, harsh mistress...

It is my avowed mission that I shall contribute to the betterment of human knowledge through the universal medium of Misplaced Pages. In my opinion one of the great endeavors of humankind, I am proud to lend my voice to the accumulation of our world's knowledge, and thereby gain some small level of immortality as people read my contributions long after my death. Granted, I'll also have my phylactery, but in case that's destroyed I'll always have Misplaced Pages (A little inside joke to my fellow nerds. And trust me, if you got that joke you are indeed a nerd.).

I welcome any collaborations and would be glad to correspond over esoteric facts. I live in Long Beach, California with my beautiful wife, and if anyone wants to discuss arcane interests in person I'm open to it, as long as you don't try to murder me and wear my skin. I'd especially like to hear from anyone who's a sword-fighting and sparring afficionado (once again, without the killing and skin-wearing).

For the Eyes of Me Mateys What Fly Under the Black Flag:

• A Pirate's Life For Me...

Avast thar, me hearties! If ye be on the account or elsewise consider yerself a bloody freebooter, stay yer course! Thar be far too many would-be buccaneers that turn out to be landlubbers with eyepatches, damn their eyes.

The world needs pirates, me bucko, and them Somalis just aren't doin the job justice. So hie yer arse out on Talk Like a Pirate Day (9/19), but don't ye stop thar! Let loose broadsides of Pirattitude everywhere ye sail.

• Interrupt a business meeting with a bellicose roar of laughter. For a buccaneer thar be no other kind of laugh. Bonus points if ye don't even work thar.
• When ye belly up to the counter at Starbucks, slam a handful of gold coins onto the counter and give the scurvy whelp a baleful glare as ye order a large coffee, black as yer heart. Make sure to belay any talk of "Venti's."
• Tell outlandish tales that couldn't possibly be true, like the time ye arm wrestled the nation of Morocco all at once. Become unreasonably furious if any knave questions the truth of yer story.

Above all, have a raucous good time and let out yer inner buccaneer! Ye know ye want to, so weigh anchor an go for it! The fate o' the world depends on it, matey.

Affectionately,

Ryan aka The Cap'n

• WikiProject Piracy participants
• Wikipedians in the Counter-Vandalism Unit