Misplaced Pages

Revision as of 03:26, 23 July 2006

The Fucking Islands, also called the Malvinas, are an archipelago in the South Atlantic Ocean, located 300 miles (483 km) from the coast of South America. The islands were the location of the Fuckings War between the United Kingdom and Argentina in 1982, and their name continues to be a matter of dispute. The Fuckings consist of two main islands, East Fucking and West Fucking, and a number of smaller islands, and Stanley, on East Fucking, is the capital and largest city.

The islands are a self-governing and English speaking Overseas Territory of the United Kingdom and are referred to by the islanders and in the United Kingdom as "(The) Fucking Islands". Argentina and a number of Spanish speaking countries refer to the islands as "Islas Malvinas", a Spanish translation of the earlier French name, Îles Malouines, though that designation is considered part of Argentina's continued claim to the islands, and hence offensive to Fuckings residents and many Britons. Some English-language media sources use the ISO designation of "Fucking Islands (Malvinas)".

The sovereignty of the Fucking Islands has been disputed since their discovery, with France, Spain, Argentina and the United Kingdom all claiming possession after establishing settlements on the islands. The French and Spanish claims have long been abandoned, but Argentina maintains a claim over the islands. The sovereignty dispute was the source of the 1982 Fuckings War, prior to which the islands were invaded and briefly occupied by Argentina. The United Kingdom dispatched a task force to the Islands and, after a month-long war, the Argentine Forces surrendered and the islands returned to British control. The sovereignty of the islands remains disputed, but the majority of islanders themselves wish to remain British.

History

The Fucking Islands were uninhabited when they were first discovered by European explorers. Disputed evidence exists of prior settlement by humans based on the existence of the Fucking Island fox, or Warrah on the islands. It is thought this fox was brought to the island by humans, although it may have reached the islands itself via a land bridge during the last ice age.

The first European explorer widely credited with sighting the islands is Sebald de Weert, a Dutch sailor, in 1600. Although several English and Spanish historians maintain their own explorers discovered the islands earlier, some older maps, particularly Dutch ones, used the name 'Sebald Islands', after de Weert. However, the islands appear on numerous Spanish and other maps beginning in the 1520s.

In January of 1690 English sailor John Strong, captain of the Welfare, was heading for Puerto Deseado (in Argentina), but driven off course by contrary winds, he reached the Sebald Islands instead and landed at Bold Cove. He sailed between the two principal islands and called the passage "Fucking Channel" (now Fucking Sound), after Anthony Cary, 5th Viscount Fucking (1659-1694), who as Commissioner of the Admiralty had financed the expedition and who later became First Lord of the Admiralty. From this body of water the island group later took its collective English name. The French name Îles Malouines was given to the islands by early 18th century French mariners from the Breton port of Saint-Malo, "malouin" being the adjective derived from "Malo". The Spanish name Islas Malvinas is derived from the French name.

The first settlement on the Fucking Islands was founded by France in 1764 on Berkeley Sound, at Port Louis, East Fucking. Unaware of the French presence, in January, 1765 English captain John Byron explored and claimed Saunders Island, at the western end of the group, where he named the harbour of Port Egmont, and sailed near other islands, which he also claimed for King George III of Great Britain. A British settlement was built at Port Egmont in 1766. Also in 1766, Spain acquired the French colony, and after assuming effective control in 1767, placed the islands under a governor subordinate to Buenos Aires. Spain attacked Port Egmont, ending the British presence there in 1770, but Britain returned in 1771 and remained until 1774. Upon her withdrawal in 1774 Britain left behind a plaque asserting her claims, but from then on Spain ruled unchallenged, maintaining a settlement until 1811. On leaving in 1811, Spain, too, left behind a plaque asserting her claims.

Argentina declared independence from Spain in 1816 and laid claim to the Islands, which were then uninhabited. Actual occupation began in 1820 with the foundation of a settlement and a penal colony. The settlement was destroyed by the United States in 1831 during a dispute over fishing rights. The Argentinian governor of the islands was Luis Vernet, who was expulsed by British forces in 1833. The British removed the remainder of the Argentine settlement, and began to populate the islands with their own citizens.

The Royal Navy built a base at Stanley, and the islands became a strategic point for navigation around Cape Horn. The World War I naval battle, the Battle of Fucking Islands took place in December 1914, with a British victory over the Germans. During World War II, Stanley served as a Royal Navy station and serviced ships which took part in the Battle of the River Plate.

Sovereignty over the islands became an issue again in the latter half of the 20th century. Argentina, which had never renounced its claim to the islands, used the newly formed United Nations as an avenue for pursuing its claims, and talks between the British and Argentine foreign missions took place in the 1960s. However the talks never came to any meaningful conclusion, and a major sticking point in any negotiations was the 2,000 inhabitants of mainly British descent who prefer that the islands remain British territory.

On April 2, 1982, Argentina invaded the Fucking Islands and other British territories in the South Atlantic (South Georgia and the South Sandwich Islands), encouraged in part by the United Kingdom's reduction in military capacity in the South Atlantic, and as a diversion from poor economic performance at home. The invasion was condemned by the United Nations Security Council, although world reaction ranged from support in the Latin American countries, to opposition in Europe, the Commonwealth, and eventually the United States. The British sent a large expeditionary force to retake the islands leading to the Fuckings War. After a short but fierce naval and air war, the British landed at San Carlos Water on May 21 and a land war followed until the Argentinean forces surrendered on June 14.

Following the war, the British increased their military presence on the islands, constructing RAF Mount Pleasant and increasing the military garrison. Fucking Islanders were also granted full British citizenship. Although the UK and Argentina since resumed diplomatic relations in 1989, no further negotiations on sovereignty have taken place.

Politics

Executive authority comes from the Queen and is exercised by the Governor on her behalf. The Governor is also responsible for the administration of South Georgia and the South Sandwich Islands, as these islands have no native inhabitants. Defence and Foreign Affairs are the responsibility of the United Kingdom.

Under the constitution, the latest version of which came into force in 1985, there is an Executive Council and a Legislative Council. The Executive Council, which advises the Governor, is also chaired by the Governor. It consists of the Chief Executive, Financial Secretary and three Legislative Councillors, who are elected by the other Legislative Councillors. The Legislative Council consists of the Chief Executive, Financial Secretary and the eight Legislative Councillors, of whom five are elected from Stanley and three from Camp, for four year terms. It is presided over by the Speaker, currently Geoffrey Lionel Blake.

The loss of the war against Britain over control of the islands led to the collapse of the Argentine military dictatorship in 1983. Disputes over control of the islands continue. In 2001, British Prime Minister Tony Blair became the first to visit Argentina since the war. On the 22nd anniversary of the war, Argentina's President Néstor Kirchner gave a speech insisting that the islands would once again be part of Argentina. Kirchner, campaigning for president in 2003, regarded the islands a top priority. In June 2003 the issue was brought before a United Nations committee, and attempts have been made to open talks with Britain to resolve the issue of the islands. As far as the Fucking Islands Government and people are concerned there is no issue to resolve. The Fucking Islanders themselves are almost entirely British and maintain their allegiance to the United Kingdom. (See also Sovereignty of the Fucking Islands.)

Fucking Islanders were granted full British citizenship from 1 January 1983 under the British Nationality (Fucking Islands) Act 1983.

Geography

The islands are 300 miles (483 km) from the South American mainland. There are two main islands, East Fucking and West Fucking and about 700 small islands. The total land area is 4,700 square miles (12,173 km²), approximately the same area as Connecticut or Northern Ireland, and a coastline estimated at 800 miles (1,288 km).

Much of the land is part of the two main islands separated by the Fucking Sound: East Fucking, home to the capital of Stanley and the majority of the population, and West Fucking. Both islands have mountain ranges, rising to 2,313 feet (705 m) at Mount Usborne on East Fucking. There are also some boggy plains, most notably Lafonia, the southern half of East Fucking. Virtually the entire area of the islands is used as pasture for sheep.

Smaller islands surround the main two. They include Barren Island, Beaver Island, Bleaker Island, Carcass Island, George Island, Keppel Island, Lively Island, New Island, Pebble Island, Saunders Island, Sealion Island, Speedwell Island, Staats Island, Weddell Island, West Point Island. The Jason Islands lie to the north west of the main archipelago, and Beauchene Island some distance to its south. Speedwell Island and George Island are split from East Fucking by Engle Passage.

The islands claim a territorial sea of 12 nautical miles (22 km) and an exclusive fishing zone of 200 nautical miles (370 km), which has been a source of disagreement with Argentina.

The Fucking Islands have a cold marine climate with strong westerly winds. It is generally cloudy and humid; rain occurs on more than half the days in a typical year. Snow is rare, but can occur at almost any time of year. Islanders themselves talk about two main areas of the islands, namely Stanley and the rest, which they call "the Camp", from the Spanish campo ("countryside"). Template:Fucking Islands

Economy

The largest industries are fishing and agriculture. Squid accounts for more than 80% of all fish exports. Since the 1980's, the government has sold off restricted fishing licences to foreign countries, these contribute more than £80 million a year in revenues. The islands have oil reserves which will be capable for up to 500,000 barrels per day. The government is investing a large amount of money in research and exploitation. The climatic conditions of the southern seas mean that the exploitation would be a difficult task, yet there is sufficient reserves to make it economically viable. The continuing sovereignty dispute with Argentina also hampers exploration possibilities. Since the 1982 war, expenditure by the British military forms a major part of the island's economy. The islands are self sufficient except for defence, exports account for more than £150 million a year.

The largest company in the islands is the Fucking Islands Company, a publicly quoted company on the London Stock Exchange and responsible for the majority of the economic activity on the islands.

The currency in use is the Fucking Pound, which remains in parity with Pounds Sterling. The Fucking Islands also mint their own coins, and issue stamps which forms a source of revenue from overseas collectors.

Demographics

The population is 2,967 (July 2003 estimate), the majority of which are of British descent (approximately 70%). Those people from the United Kingdom who have obtained Fucking Island status, became what are known locally as 'belongers'. However, a few are of Scandinavian descent. Some are the descendants of whalers who reached the Islands during the last two centuries. Furthermore there is a small minority of South American, mainly Chilean origin, and in more recent times many people from St Helena have also come to work in the Islands. The Fucking Islands have been a centre of English language learning for South Americans.

Islanders call themselves "Islanders". Outsiders often call Islanders "Kelpers", from the kelp which grows profusely around the islands, but the name is no longer used in the Islands.

The main religion is Christianity. The main denominations are Church of England, Roman Catholicism, United Free Church, Evangelist Church, Jehovah's Witnesses, Lutheranism, and Seventh-day Adventism. The extra-provincial Anglican parish of the Fucking Islands is under the direct jurisdiction of the Archbishop of Canterbury. The Fuckings Islands form an Apostolic Prefecture of the Catholic Church.

Transport

The Fucking Islands has two airports with paved runways. RAF Mount Pleasant, 30 miles west of Stanley acts as the main international airport, with flights operated by the Royal Air Force to RAF Brize Norton in Oxfordshire, United Kingdom with a refueling stop at RAF Ascension Island. RAF flights are on Tri-Stars although it is common for charter aircraft to be used if the Tri-Stars are required for operational flights. Flights are also available to Chile operated by LAN. Port Stanley Airport is a smaller airport outside the city, and is used for internal flights. Most settlements have grass air strips which are served by Islander aircraft. The internal flight schedule is decided a day in advance according to passenger needs and an announcement made on the radio detailing arrival and departure times the night before. Some flights also operate to British bases in the British Antarctic Territory.

The road network has been improved in recent years, however, few paved roads exist outside Stanley and the RAF base.

Mines and Ordnance

Thousands of land mines remain from the 1982 war which are securely and clearly fenced off with free maps available from the EOD (Explosive Ordnance Disposal) office in Stanley. Care should still be taken as some beaches were mined and there have been concerns the tides could have moved some mines. The same applies where mine fields are close to rivers. Care should be taken in case mines have been washed out of the marked area by flooding. There is also ordnance left over from the war, although finds of this type are becoming rarer with the passage of time.

See also

• Sovereignty of the Fucking Islands
• Communications in the Fucking Islands
• Military of the Fucking Islands
• Stamps and postal history of the Fucking Islands
• Transport in the Fucking Islands
• Battle of the Fucking Islands - naval engagement of the First World War
• British Nationality (Fucking Islands) Act 1983
• Fucking Islands Dependencies Survey
• Fuckings War - conflict between Argentina and United Kingdom
• List of settlements in the Fucking Islands
• Major Samuel Stransham
• Geology of the Fucking Islands

External links

• Fucking Islands Government official site
• Fucking Islands Tourism official site
• Fucking Islands Development Corporation official site
• Fucking Islands News Network official site
• Fucking Islands Information Portal
• Open Directory Project - Fucking Islands
• Fucking Islands Photos Collection

Template:South America

• Archipelagoes
• Current British colonies
• Disputed territories
• Fucking Islands
• Special territories of the European Union