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A Cleveland steamer (also known as a Pasadena mudslide, Hot lunch, Kama Sutra for the workingman, Boston pancake, California Pizza Hotplate, Hot Carl, or Chili Dog) is sexual slang for a sexual act, in which one partner defecates on the other partner's chest. It is sometimes rubbed onto the recipient using a steamroller motion with the buttocks.
This practice is more about humiliation and dominance than it is about sexual gratification, although submissives who have a taste for humiliation as well as a fetish for the scatological, will link such an act to sex. That places this act into the realm of S&M or sadomasochism since it is a power exchange and requires top and bottom participants. The Cleveland steamer is also considered an extreme way of breaking up with your partner.
The references to the city of Cleveland are unclear and lost in the mists of time, but most likely are derived from a play on the word cleavage or is a reference to Cleveland's NFL football team, the Browns. The steamer part of the name refers to the wisps of "smoke", actually condensing moisture, being released by the still-warm feces.
Variation: The Boston pancake
The Boston pancake is a variation of the Cleveland steamer in which one partner defecates on the chest of the other partner. The partner will slam and mash the feces into a "pancake" with the buttocks. The partner will then ejaculate on to the "pancake" which serves as "syrup." The reference to the city of Boston is unclear in this variation as well...
Variation: The chili dog
The chili dog is a variation of the Cleveland steamer in which a man defecates on the chest of a woman while rubbing his penis between her breasts causing ejaculation. However, this claim is refuted by some who believe that a chili dog is in fact getting a "titty-wank" having previously had anal sex, or in fact masturbating in faeces deposited on a woman's breasts via a Cleveland steamer.
Variation: The hot lunch
Hot lunch is not another way of saying Cleveland Steamer, but rather it explains the process of someone defecating in your mouth. Variations include the Vegetarian Hot Lunch where the individual receiving the gift places plastic wrap over their mouth thereby creating the sensation of a Hot Lunch but not actually having to taste the surprise.
Variation: The Filipino flipside
This is a modified version in which the partner sits and has a bowel movement on the back of a person rather than their chest. "Flip" is a racial slur for a person of Filipino heritage.
Variation: The Pittsburgh platter/plate job/glass bottom boat
In a somewhat cleaner variation, a plate job is a quasi-sexual act where a person defecates onto a transparent surface, usually plate glass, such as a glass coffee table. An observer lies under the surface, presumably to take sexual gratification from watching the person defecate.
This act is akin to a Cleveland steamer, with the exception that the latter is often performed directly upon the recipient, without the dividing grace of a transparent surface. The glass is the difference between safe sex and, in this instance, unsafe sexual practices, since human feces can contain a wide variety of harmful parasites, bacteria and viruses, most prominent of which is hepatitis.
A variant is the use of a glass or glass bottomed receptacle, such as a fish bowl, which is placed over the recipient's face and filled forthwith.
Popular culture
- Najeh Davenport, the Green Bay Packers backup running back, may have been attempting a variation on the Cleveland Steamer shortly after he was drafted by the Packers in 2002. He was arrested for allegedly defecating in the closet of a woman living in a Barry University dorm. Efforts to nickname him "the Cleveland Steamer" both for this act and for his bruising running style have not been successful.
- The band Tenacious D mentions the act in the song "Rock Your Socks." They have also sold mock baseball jerseys at concerts for the fictitious "Cleveland Steamers" baseball team, sporting the player number 666.
- Hollywood films mentioning the act include Not Another Teen Movie and Woody Allen's Crimes and Misdemeanors.
- In the Family Guy episode "Mr. Saturday Knight," Peter Griffin becomes a prostitute. While he is standing on a street corner, his wife Lois drives by and stops at traffic lights. He propositions her, then asks her if she'd like a Cleveland steamer, to which she replies angrily "GET INTO THE CAR!...what's a Cleveland steamer?" Brian begins to explain when Peter cuts in and says "Whoah, be cool, be cool."
- On the Stroker and Hoop episode "XXX Wife," the character Defo was nominated for a "Pornie Award" for Best Cleveland Steamer of the Year. He won hands-down, and was given a giant award in the shape of a phallic symbol. Unforunately, he died later in the episode. He was extremely embarrassed of it during the short time he was still alive, and was killed because he tried to change the award's records.
- The term has also been frequently (and comically) mentioned by Dean of Big Brother 2005 (Australia).
- On the 10 December 2005 episode of The Daily Show, Cleveland Steamers are mentioned in a correspondent report with Ed Helms.
- Mark Oaten famously enjoyed this sex act with two rent boys in a scandal leading to his resignation from the Liberal Democrat front bench in January 2006.
- A plate job was referred to in the John Waters film, A Dirty Shame.
- A plate job was hinted at in the animated series Drawn Together, episode 20, A Very Special Drawn Together Afterschool Special (Drawn Together episode) where Xandir is role-playing a male prostitute and breaks through the cheap glass on the "Sh*tting Table," crushing Ling-Ling in his guise as "Mr. Nagasaki" to death, prompting Foxxy Love to exclaim that "Daddy" (their pimp portrayed by Spanky Ham) should have bought a quality German made table since Swedes don't know crap about sh*t. This is a double reference to cheaply made Scandanavian furniture (see IKEA) and a perceived German love of scat play.
- The Bob and Tom Show, which is broadcast coast to coast by radio, has a song by a group named The Mad Armenians which is called "Cleveland Steamer." The song suggests the names of countless sex acts you can try with your partner. Bob and Tom cast member, Kristi Lee, warns women against actually looking up the meaning of the mentioned sex acts.
- In the mid 1980s, a drunken Andre the Giant accidentally let loose a Cleveland steamer when sitting on his opponent.
- a2m the british pop-punk band frequently refer to cleveland steamers, chilli dogs and other such actions during their live performances. The singer will often offer the bassist a california pizza hotplate and the bassist will turn it down, usually implying that they have performed the act on stage once previously.
- In his song "Dirty Sanchez Song" comedian Craig Carmean makes several references to the Cleveland Steamer and it's many variations, including: Hot Carl, hot lunch, chili dog, and glass bottom boat
References
- Silverstein, Tom (October 30, 2002). "Davenport decides it's time to move on". Milwaukee Journal Sentinel.