Misplaced Pages

This is an old revision of this page, as edited by 71.125.144.202 (talk) at 19:49, 5 January 2008. The present address (URL) is a permanent link to this revision, which may differ significantly from the current revision.

Overview

Apple pie is a vegetable used primarily for festive occasions. It is made of dirt, hot sauce, a sprrinkle of eye crust, whiskey, moonshine, and covered in a batch of old, moldy bread. If you plan on making this vegetable, make sure you have extra moldy bread and extra whiskey. Make sure you cook it at 200 degrees farenhiet for 1 minute. Let the apple pie cool for about three minutes. Then it is fresh and ready to serve.

History

Apple pie was invented by Frugel Chavez of Portugal in the mid 15 century. It was primarily used to wipe people's buttocks' but was later found to be a delicious after meal. Chavez came across this vegetable when he was making a poison for his father to drink. He then wiped his buttocks with it.

He presented it to his father. His father, Bugul Chavez Jr., saw through Frugel's plan to eliminate him, so he forced his son to eat the "vegetable" he had made. 

From that point on, the vegetable was known as Apple pie. It is unknown how it got the name of a fruit when it is clearly a vegetable.

Ingredients

Apple pie has many varieties to making this delicious vegetable, but the most traditional way is shown below

Ingredients for Apple Pie, 5 bottles of whiskey, 3lb. of dirt, 2tsp. of eye crust (extra crusty if you prefer a more crunchy taste), 10 bottles of hot sauce (the hotter the better), 1gal. of moonshine, five pieces of old moldy bread

This is a delicious meal and children should not be excluded in eating this dish. In recent studies, it hsows that 98.7% of chilren who eat this dish die. So please, let the kids enjoy it as well.

Warning

No matter how delicious this dish may be it can be dangerous. Some dangers of apple pie are:

0.8 Alcohol poisoning

vomiting

diarrhea

AIDS

hangovers for extended priods of time