This is an old revision of this page, as edited by Hawkeye7 (talk | contribs) at 11:32, 3 December 2013 (→GA Review). The present address (URL) is a permanent link to this revision, which may differ significantly from the current revision.
Revision as of 11:32, 3 December 2013 by Hawkeye7 (talk | contribs) (→GA Review)(diff) ← Previous revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)GA Review
| GA toolbox |
|---|
| Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Reviewer: Moswento (talk · contribs) 08:56, 3 December 2013 (UTC)
- Hello! I'll take this one. Full review to follow in due course. Moswento 08:56, 3 December 2013 (UTC)
- Sources
Before I continue with this review, I have a major concern with the sources for this article. Currently, the majority of the article seems to be referenced to questionable sources. However, I may have misunderstood, and the prose is very good, so I'm leaving this open for you to respond.
- Ancestry.com - Aren't these just user-generated family trees?
- Pretty much, but it is only used for his parents' names. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:32, 3 December 2013 (UTC)
- WW2enlistment.org - I realise you only use this for an enlistment date, but this appears to be a self-confessed potentially unreliable source. "We have reason to believe there is some information on the enlistee that might contain inaccuracies or data quality issues."
- Yes, it is only used for his enlistment date. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:32, 3 December 2013 (UTC)
- "Short Biograpical Sketch" - this is currently used to source the majority of the article. My concern is two-fold. 1) As a biographical statement written by Uanna himself, relying so heavily on it raises questions of reliability. 2) How do we know it's even authentic?
- Its authenticity is vouched for by the MPHRA. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:32, 3 December 2013 (UTC)
- "Assassination as Non-Proliferation" - I cannot see a blog comment meeting WP:RS
- History News Network - as above
- HNN is a reliable source. But what we are actually sourcing is his son's comments, which supports what the article says avout his son. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:32, 3 December 2013 (UTC)
- Text
Some of the text issues I spotted before the source issues temporarily halted my review:
- Lead: "I Service Command" - links to an article that doesn't seem to mention "I Service Command"
- Nope. That's the correct article. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:32, 3 December 2013 (UTC)
- Lead: "After the he" - Is there a missing word here?
- Yes. Corrected. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:32, 3 December 2013 (UTC)
- Early life: "he attended Medford High School." - this doesn't follow from the rest of the sentence
- Re-phrased. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:32, 3 December 2013 (UTC)
- Early life: "Massachusetts where" - "Massachusetts, where"
- Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:32, 3 December 2013 (UTC)
- CIC: "After the atomic bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki in and" - missing word between "in" and "and"?
- Removed "and" Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:32, 3 December 2013 (UTC)