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Mr. Burns

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Template:Simpsons character Charles Montgomery Burns, normally referred to as Mr. Burns, but also by the name C. Montgomery Burns, or even "Monty" Burns, is a fictional character on The Simpsons, voiced by Harry Shearer. He is the owner of the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant, and Homer Simpson's boss.

He is very rich; with a net worth of $16.8 billion, he ranks second amongst the Forbes Fictional 15 (2006). Due to the fact he is Springfield's most powerful (and probably only) plutocrat, Mr. Burns is the only villain in the show who can do whatever he wants without consequence or interference from the police. He is attended at almost all times by Waylon Smithers, his loyal aide, advisor, confidant and secret admirer. Burns has a seemingly child-like dependence on Smithers, who performs all of his tasks for him, from serving him breakfast to kidnapping Tom Jones.

With his unapologetic and near-complete disdain for morality, as well as his insidious and sprawling influence, Burns essentially represents a cynical view of the 'true face' of modern Corporate America (he is evil). Burns will even go as far as to torture and fire his employees for his own entertainment. Matt Groening has told the Portland Tribune that his inspiration for the character's name came from the very large Montgomery Park sign atop a former Montgomery Ward high-rise in Portland, Oregon's Northwest Industrial district. (It is also rumored, however, that he may have taken the name from fellow artist Charles Burns, a classmate at The Evergreen State College in Olympia, Washington.)

Template:Spoiler

Burns was originally designed as a one-dimensional recurring villain, who might occasionally enter the Simpsons' lives and wreak some sort of havoc; however, his popularity has meant that many significant details concerning his life have been made known – many of these mirroring those of other rich businessmen, fictional or real. (For example, in Two Cars in Every Garage and Three Eyes on Every Fish, he yelled "You can't do this to me, I'm Charles! Montgomery! Burns!", an allusion to Orson Welles's Citizen Kane; this particular connection has been explored in other episodes, both broadly and in subtle detail.) His favorite expression is the word "Excellent," muttered slowly in a low, sinister voice while tenting his fingertips.

Age

Burns' true age is one of the many ongoing subjects of discussion among fans. His birthday is September 15, but the year of his birth is uncertain. It has seemed to fluctuate at intervals during the course of the show. Occasionally referred to as "Springfield's oldest resident", he is shown as being younger than Abraham Simpson in several episodes. It is frequently alluded to that Mr. Burns was born in the late 19th or early 20th century; in an episode where Burns is at the DMV taking a driver's test he shows his old license which was listed to expire in 1909. (There has been little change in his appearance over the intervening decades, according to the associated picture, though he did have more hair.)

File:BurnsLicense.png
Image of Burns' license, from the episode Goo Goo Gai Pan

He answers the telephone with the salutation ahoy-hoy, the greeting proposed by telephone pioneer Alexander Graham Bell.

Flashbacks to his early childhood are often recorded in sepia tone, a reference both to early motion-picture technology and the vagaries of memory. In the Season 8 episode Burns, Baby burns, during which Mr. Burns recalls a Yale class reunion, there was a banner saying 'Class of 1914' at the reunion, so he would have been born in 1892. He has been explicitly referred to as being as young as 81, and as old as 104. In the fifteenth season episode Fraudcast News, Mr. Burns mentions that he was born in 1889.

In "The Seemingly Never-Ending Story" Burns stated that his birthplace was Pangaea, the super-continent that existed during the age of the dinosaurs. On the wall of his manor, one can see a stuffed triceratops head, next to that of an elephant. Mr. Burns' longevity has been credited to Satan, to whom he was photographed giving a $1 billion check, in one episode, and whom he was actually reputed to be, in another. It is occasionally implied that Mr. Burns worships Satan. However, he still must have a lengthy operation once a week in order to stave off death — this leaves him in a blissful narcotic haze, with a pronounced radioactive glow. (A state of homeostasis, created by his having all diseases known to man — known as "Three Stooges syndrome" — has thus far prevented him from suffering any particular debilitating disease.) He frequently builds children's hospitals so he can use them as organ banks, and may have to cryonically freeze himself in the future, until a cure can be found for "seventeen stab wounds to the back".

In another episode, Burns was depicted in a 19th century cartoon as terrorizing children. His account password was his age, and required a 4-digit number.

Biography

Early life

When he was very young, Burns lived happily with his loving, natural parents, little (though born in 1896) brother George, and teddy bear Bobo. His parents called him "Happy". When Burns was given the chance, he left his natural family to live with a twisted and heartless billionaire, leaving his unhealthy childhood behind him.

His mother is still alive, apparently in her early 130's, although no mention of her as alive has been made since the show's tenth season. She is very resentful of her son (he once tried to euthanize her — "who could've known you'd pull through and...live...for another 5 decades?"). It has been revealed that she had an affair with U.S. President William Howard Taft, an act for which Burns has never forgiven her. Burns calls her 'Mater' (Latin for 'Mother', a common 19th century term of endearment among the aristocratic and wealthy). On one of his own medical forms, Burns wrote under "cause of parents' death": got in my way. In another episode, he says that lack of indoor plumbing "killed my mother".

The Burns family seems to have owned at least one "atom mill" at the start of the 20th century, employing strong laborers to split atoms by repeatedly hitting anvils with sledgehammers. His miserliness is congenital: his grandfather once had an employee walled-up in an abandoned coke oven for stealing six atoms. As a privileged child, Burns amused himself by injuring hapless immigrant laborers – in one episode, a very young Monty rammed an Irish Coney Island amusement park worker with a bumper car until he was paralyzed from the waist down. (Burns imagines that such an activity is still socially-acceptable for the well-to-do. Indeed, he used to ride a fat man to work.) He and his family members are usually portrayed as archetypal early capitalist exploiters, and he has not become any more progressive over the decades. When Marge Simpson suggested "theme days" to improve worker morale, he leaped at the idea of "Child Labor Day". Several employees at his Nuclear Plant speak no English (Tibor, Zutroy), several of them are enslaved Brazilian football players ('that plane landed on my property!'), and several of them are avians – 'Stuart the Duck' is in charge of intra-plant waste transport, for example.

When spying on his workers via his security camera network, he inevitably refers to them using archaic, derogatory terms. (His own internal dictionary does not include 'recycling', but places emphasis on 'ragamuffin'). Burns graduated from Yale University in 1914, where he studied science and even played on the varsity football team. He was also inducted into the infamous Skull and Bones secret society. He maintains a certain degree of contact with his alma mater, and has some influence with the admissions committee (though sometimes not as much as he needs). He has a chair (literally a dark, satanic throne with snarling dogs chained to the arms) at Springfield University. He may have had an affair with 'Countess von Zeppelin'. He claims to have personally known President Calvin Coolidge.

In 1939, Burns went to his 25 college reunion. There he met Lily Bancroft, the daughter of an old flame. He took her to see Gone With the Wind, and they gave into lust after hearing Clark Gable utter his famous forbidden phrase at the end of the film. Their brief affair resulted in Lily giving birth to a son, Larry Burns (voiced by Rodney Dangerfield). Her family forced her to give up Larry to an orphanage, then, according to Burns, they "bundled her off to a convent in the South Seas." He did not meet his son until the adult Larry's quest to find his biological father, and an accidental sighting on a train, brought him to Springfield. When it became obvious that Burns was more than a little embarrassed by his boorish progeny, Homer hatched a scheme to "fake-nap" Larry in an effort to demonstrate to Burns that he really loved him. However, the plan backfired, and Larry left Springfield.

In C.E. D'oh Burns revealed that he once had a fiancée named Gertrude. He was such a workaholic, he not only missed the wedding but their divorce, as well: "She died of loneliness. Loneliness and rabies."

According to Simpson Family Tree records published in the Simpsons Uncensored Family Album, Mr. Burns is a distant relative to Homer Simpson.

World War II and Beyond

Burns served in the United States Army during World War II. A member of Springfield's Flying Hellfish squad battalion, he saw action (and played some tennis) in the Ardennes during the Battle of the Bulge, serving under Sergeant Abraham Simpson. He was thereafter transferred to the South Pacific with part of his squad.

Burns may also have worked for (or traded with) Nazi Germany, as he once remarked, "Schindler and I are like peas in a pod: we're both factory owners, we both made shells for the Nazis, but mine worked, damn it!" (Abraham Simpson explains that Burns was demoted to the rank of a private after trying to block a probe from J. Edgar Hoover, an obvious reference to Hoover's alleged homosexuality, although Hoover may also have been investigating Burns' dealings with the Nazis).

Burns' close relationship with former German Empires is further supported by the fact that a Kaiser Wilhelm doppelganger, complete with handlebar mustache and pickelhaube helmet, was the only guest on his side during his failed attempt to marry Marge Simpson's mother Jacqueline Bouvier. Also, when Burns met with a German business consortium to discuss selling his nuclear plant, it was revealed that he speaks fluent German. In the episode Midnight Rx, Mr. Burns describes how he flew the Plywood Pelican six feet above the ground — for a distance of four feet — until he learned that "rain made it catch fire". After that he said "the Führer" fired him, further implying a link with the Nazis.

Shortly after the war Monty sued his mother (Revealed in Simpsons Halloween comics.) At the end of the war he was personally hired by President Harry S Truman to transport a specially-printed trillion-dollar bill to Europe. It was to be the United States Government's original contribution to the reconstruction of Europe — as America's richest citizen, he was thought to be also the most trustworthy. However, the bill (and Burns) vanished en route. In 1998 it was later discovered to be carried on his person at all times, and ended up in the hands of Fidel Castro after Burns tried to buy the island of Cuba. It is implied he would be charged with the theft, and possibly treason, but that he would bribe the jury to secure an acquittal.

During the 1960s, Burns operated a biological weapons laboratory until it was destroyed by peace activists — including Mona Simpson, Homer's mother (the laboratory's motto was When the H-Bomb isn't enough). Shortly thereafter he built the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant. In the 1970s, his major collaborator, Waylon Smithers Sr., died while trying to prevent a nuclear accident. To keep his plant's reputation high, Burns disposed of the body in an abandoned quarry, where it was later discovered by an adolescent Homer. Homer soon forgot about it, but remembered the incident quite vividly after a magician managed to make him act like a 13 year old with his memories from that age. Burns took responsibility for Smithers' son, Waylon Smithers Jr. Burns never told him the truth about his father's death, saying that he was "killed in the Amazon by a tribe of savage women".

In another episode, Burns sabotages a Greenpeace environmental action, from the inside: "It was I, you fools! The man you trusted wasn't Wavy Gravy at all! And all this time I was smoking harmless tobacco!"

Present day

Burns maintains a monopoly over Springfield's energy resources, owning both the electric company (Springfield Nuclear Power Plant has been his for roughly 30 years, though he once claimed to own it for "three score and twain; that's 62 years in the 'New English'") and the water works. He also owns a hotel on Baltic Avenue.

Several incidents have occurred during which he has lost his sole control of the plant: briefly when Homer and Lisa staged a hostile takeover; when he found out he was flat broke; when he sold the plant to German investors; and when he lost all of his money in a bet with Colonel O'Hara, the Rich Texan Guy.

Burns has been known to use his economic power to blackmail mayor Joe Quimby, and the citizens of the town in general. As a result, Burns is widely hated by the people of Springfield, and in return he has nothing but contempt for them, dismissing them with such insulting names as "Joe Sixpack", "Sally Housecoat", "Eddie Punchclock", "Betsy Bleeding-Heart" and "Maynard G. Muskievote". Despite this, all the people of Springfield have to get presents for him (as seen in the episode Rosebud).

He has occasionally run other businesses in Springfield — most notably the Monty Burns Casino, which operated for several years after Springfield legalized gambling. He also co-owned the "Li'l Lisa" recycling and ocean slurry manufacturing plant, and he once 'slant-drilled' for oil under Springfield Elementary School, destroying the lives and livelihoods of many people, amazingly all related to the Simpson family (eg. Abe's home was sunk, Moe's tavern filled with toxins, Bart's dog stuck in a cast, etc.).

There have also been references to possible control of an anti-democratic government force in South America: "Compadres, it is imperative that we crush the freedom fighters before the start of the rainy season. And remember, a shiny new donkey for whoever brings me the head of Colonel Montoya" (said to the SNPP workers before realizing he has given the wrong speech).

Burns resides in a vast, ornate mansion on an immense estate called Burns Manor, located at the corner of Croesus and Mammon streets in the 'Springfield Heights' district. (His actual address is 1000 Mammon Street, and he is neighbour to Kent Brockman).

His estate is the site of an annual company picnic, but he is not generally fond of visitors. The sprawling estate is protected by a high wall, an electrified fence and a team of vicious attack dogs (the source of his other catchphrase: "Release the hounds"). He maintains a force of Wizard of Oz-style guards, a personal paramilitary force, and a dangerously unstable robotic version of Richard Simmons.

The mansion itself is replete with interesting nooks and crannies. It includes: a room containing a thousand monkeys at a thousand typewriters; a bottomless pit (for all intents and purposes); a human chessboard (formerly a tennis court); the largest television in the free world; a 'Hall of Patriots' commemorating his ancestors; and rare historical artifacts (the only existing nude photo of Mark Twain, the suit Charlie Chaplin was buried in, King Arthur's mythical sword Excalibur, a rare first draft of the Constitution with the word "suckers" in it).

His home also contains a "playroom" — a theater showing plays round-the clock (regardless of whether or not anyone is actually watching); a laboratory filled with bizarre chemicals and outdated equipment; a botanical garden and aviary (with vultures surprisingly similar to Burns in visage); and a safe containing a Beefeater guard.

He has an elaborate miniature railway, which disappears through a hole in the wall and returns three hours later. Bart quotes, 'One time it had snow on it'. Instead of making his bed, Burns drops the bed through the floor into an incinerator each morning — after the floor closes, a brand new bed pops out of the wall with linens already in place.

Burns does, however, have a surprisingly unpleasant basement ("I really should stop ending the tour with it").

He may also maintain a separate residence in Pennsylvania, which contains a 'Super Fun Happy Slide' and various vampire-related accouterments (although this is not considered Canon)

Burns' office at the nuclear plant contains a number of similarly outlandish features. One wall can be raised to reveal various surprises, including: his team of ten high-priced lawyers; a special microbe-resistant chamber in which he plans to shelter during any upcoming flu epidemic; a two-seat escape pod (Smithers assumes the second seat is for him, but was in fact installed because Burns likes to put his feet up), and a secret trapdoor that he drops fired employees down.

The office also contains a ceiling-mounted suction tube which he can use to transport dissident workers to Morocco.

The gigantic stuffed polar bear in the corner has a secret tunnel under it that leads to the old quarry.

The office floor opens up like that of Auric Goldfinger's, revealing a miniature scale model of Springfield. He used this model to demonstrate his sun-blocker-outer in Who Shot Mr. Burns?, and proceeded to go on a Godzilla-like rampage through the city.

He has also riddled the office with trap doors, peepholes, and a catapult that fires 100 gram weights ("It sounded large when I ordered it.") for use against workers and Nuclear Regulatory Commission inspectors.

Apparently, his entire office can be rotated so that his window has different views.

Another sliding wall, encompassing the bookcase and security monitors, can reveal the headquarters of the "League of Evil", a cabal which once consisted of a mad scientist (possibly Graeme Garden from The Goodies), a WWI-era German officer, a cowboy, a US Air Force officer, and a samurai. When Burns calls upon them, unfortunately, he finds nothing but their skeletal remains sitting at a conference table, all of them having long ago died due to the lack of oxygen behind the wall (Smithers remarks; "Even monsters need air, sir.") After his initial dismay at their passing, he orders their watches to be gathered.

Burns's telephone number is 636-555-0001 in 'Lisa's Date with Density', and 636-555-0113 in 'A Tale of Two Springfields'.

His Social Security number is 000-00-0002 ("Damn That Roosevelt").

In 1995 Burns built an elaborate contraption to block out the sun in Springfield, thus ensuring that citizens would have to use (and pay for) his electricity 24 hours a day. The move earned him universal hatred from the people of Springfield, and he was ultimately shot. However, it later came to light, after an intensive police search, that the violence had occurred accidentally, perpetrated by Maggie Simpson. Before Maggie was revealed to be the shooter, however, "everyone in town a suspect" — Burns had angered just about everyone with some of his policies over the years and in that episode particularly. (There have been subsequent indications that Maggie might have shot him intentionally.)

It is not known who presently stands to inherit his wealth (especially since Smithers is to be buried alive in Burns' coffin). He once chose Bart Simpson to be his de jure heir, but this failed when Bart displayed loyalty to his former family by refusing to fire Homer upon command. Burns soon disowned him. Burns may leave his money to the Egg Advisory Council, as he has stated he would do this if he felt he had failed to find a suitable heir. It is possible Larry Burns would inherit it (though Burns would later indicate he knew of Larry's existence, in the episode where he adopts Bart he claims to have never fathered a child).

He has been engaged at least twice in recent years, to Jacqueline Bouvier and to a policewoman named Gloria. Both women left him before the marriages actually took place.

In an attempt to lure people away from the growing cult of the "Movementarians", Burns attempted to start his own religion, with himself as its 'Golden God'. After Smithers advised him not to adopt the 'K' from the logo of Special K cereal or a Mickey Mouse-based motif as its defining symbol, he determined to use a Christmas Tree with a giant 'B' on the front. At the grand opening of his new religion, Burns used special effects and his riot police to try and awe the crowd. However, a spark from a Catherine wheel ignited his fake beard and golden body suit, resulting in him falling from his balcony after Smithers tried to extinguish the flames.

Organizations

Health

Because of his age, Burns is very physically weak, often to the point where he seems to straddle the line between life and death. He often has great difficulty performing the most basic physical tasks, such as giving a thumbs-up, crushing a paper cup or stepping on an insect. A single high-five is capable of knocking Burns off his feet, while bunting a baseball is enough to knock him to the backstop (to be fair, Roger Clemens was pitching). He is light enough to be pushed over by an ant.

His organs have grown immensely weak over the years: his heart is black, desiccated, and barely beats at all. It is shrunken to the size of a cherry. On one occasion, Burns' brain fell out through his ear. Another time, his lungs came out through his mouth and acted like an airbag. In the dark, Burns' skin glows a "healthy" green, due to his constant exposure to Radiation.

It has been hinted that Burns can survive without his heart - he stated that, after a One-Thousand dollar bill struck his chest, "had my heart been inside at the time, it could have been fatal". His heart was, however, once restarted by a bolt of lightning connected to a kite string he was flying, and he implied that it was the first time for a long time it had beaten.

Once, Smithers accidentally let a bathing sponge fall atop Burns' head (Mr. Burns had complained that the sponge had corners, prompting Smithers to leave to find a spherical one), leading him to sink into his bathtub and nearly drown.

He is so ancient that when his finger is pricked, he bleeds dust.

He wears dentures which replace themselves with a cash register bell "cha-ching", ("Hmm... I think I'll have the fangs today").

He once told Smithers that he must have his brain flushed out with vinegar and his eyes "re-balled". Smithers has told Burns that his knees will be "back from the shop tomorrow".

It has been revealed that if Burns sweats even one drop, he could die of dehydration unless he takes a bath immediately.

Years of working in a nuclear plant have made Burns "as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner".

If he is not careful, fluid can build up in his hands, causing them to swell to enormous proportions.

He is so bony that when he sits down, it appears as though his pants are creased even when they aren't. The individual bones in his spine are also noticeable when Burns is viewed naked from the side.

In the episode Goo Goo Gai Pan, it is revealed, on Mr. Burns' driver's license, that he is 5' 10". However, this was probably his youth/peak height (in 1909), and he is probably shorter now.

In one episode when he went for a health check, the doctor tried to take his blood sample and the syringe needle goes right through his arm, and the doctor even quotes "Strange. It's... like poking through meringue." It was revealed in the same episode that he has every medical condition known to man (including juvenile diabetes and hysterical pregnancy), and some previously-unknown ones newly discovered inside him. However, all the viruses block each other out -- like the Three Stooges all trying to push through a doorway at once -- leaving him semi-healthy. He leaves thinking he is indestructible ("Even a slight breeze could..." "Indestructible").

He once died and Smithers & Homer created an elaborate puppet rig to fool investors that he was alive. In the process Smithers was making Mr. Burns do a dance which restarted his heart and brought him back to life.

As Burns realizes his mortality he mentions the possibility of dying again, implying that he has died several times before.

State of mind

Mr. Burns is perpetually forgetting Homer Simpson's name, and he often forgets that he ever knew of his existence. This is a running gag on the show, and drives Homer quite insane (though he remembered his name when he had it changed to Max Power for a brief time.) On the other hand, this may serve to explain why Burns directly fires Homer in several episodes, and yet Homer inexplicably has his job back by next week's show.

Generally, Mr. Burns is portrayed as being deeply "out of touch".

  • He often slips into language appropriate for the early 20th century or even the 19th century ("score", meaning 20 years, "twain", meaning 2, and "post-haste", meaning rapidly). He denounces today's non-usage of these words to the advent of "New English."
  • He calls peanuts "crackleberries".
  • He thinks Prussia is still a separate country (it became a part of the newly-formed German Empire in 1871, and is now largely within Poland).
  • Upon arriving at a gas station, Burns orders Marge (whom he mistakes for an attendant) to "revulcanize my tires post-haste", and refers to gasoline as "petroleum distillate". (Petroleum Distillate is still available for sale in some parts of Australia.)
  • He once claimed to have watched the DuMont Network "last night". (To be fair, Burns only mentioned seeing something "on the DuMont," and thus could have been using the name to refer to the TV set itself. This would be (albeit only slightly) less anachronistic.)
  • He once created a small model airplane which he called the Spruce Moose a play on the "Spruce Goose" and later threatened Smithers with a revolver to board it.
  • He thinks that Sir Donald Bradman, Stewie Dempster, and Vic Richardson are all still alive and still playing cricket.
  • He believes that Thailand is still called Siam, and that Congo-Kinshasa is still the Belgian Congo.
  • He thought Fulgencio Batista was still the president of Cuba, until he flew there and discovered Fidel Castro was the President.
  • He calls Principal Skinner "dean" and refers to his grade as "fourth form" while pretending to be a student at Springfield Elementary School.
  • He thinks that Al Jolson is still alive.
  • He only has one testicle.
  • He is substantially confused by the marketing of both ketchup and catsup.
  • He has an actual mace instead of Mace.
  • He thinks that India is still part of the British Empire, despite India's having gained independence in 1947.
  • He thinks that JFK Airport is still called Idlewild Airport.
  • He demands that his mail be delivered by autogyro, considers donuts to be "ethnic food," and he answers his "telephone machine" with "ahoy-hoy?" (in the manner of Alexander Graham Bell before "hello" became commonplace).
  • He still uses the word "gay" in its meaning of "jolly".
  • He refers to the television as a "jumping box" and a "picto-cube".
  • With regards to professional baseball, he believes that there is still a Negro League. When he orders Smithers to find the nine celebrity baseball players who would be on his company softball team, he asks for Honus Wagner, Cap Anson and Mordecai Brown, all of whom are dead.
  • Also related to baseball is when he says, after giving Homer Simpson a Joe DiMaggio baseball card, "Apparently they've started letting ethnics into the big leagues". At the same time he gave Homer the DiMaggio card, he says DiMaggio is "that rookie from the New York Nine"; to be exact, he thinks that they continue to use the "New York Nine" nickname for the New York Yankees. DiMaggio's rookie year was 1936.
  • When asked about his hobbies during a date, Burns spies the crowd for youthful-looking answers. He says his hobbies include (from seeing kids enjoying on-track car rides ) "piloting motorcoaches" and (from seeing a man pick up after his dog) "collecting dog waste", believing that the latter is a commonplace pastime for young people.
  • He says of the Fire Department; "They're new but they're good."
  • He believes cars still have levers instead of a steering wheel; when learning to drive a car for the first time, he is confident that the manual will tell him "which lever is the velocitator and which is the deceleratrix." He still thinks of driving an automobile as being a special privilege — he drives around town with no regard for traffic laws in the style of rich young motorists of the early 1900s. He drives dressed in the style of early 20th century drivers — gloves, a hat and a mask.
  • In addition to his limousine, he owns a 1936 maroon Stutz Bearcat, which he drives whilst wearing a Victorian motorists' outfit which includes hat and goggles, and at times he drives a luxury 1948 Rolls-Royce with which he once hit 10 year old Bart Simpson while driving.
  • He writes letters using a quill pen and bottle of ink.
  • He doesn't know what ice cream is until he actually tries it... almost 100 years after the first ice cream cone was introduced ("I'm beginning to like this so-called iced-cream").
  • Trying to chat up a young woman, Burns offers to play the clavichord and to show some "stereopticon images" of the Crimean War.
  • Burns has trouble understanding modern slang, such as "in-to".
  • Faced by the belated news of the Stock Market Crash of 1929 on his tickertape machine, Burns moves his shareholdings into "the blue chips, Transatlantic Zeppelin, Amalgamated Spats, Congreve's Inflammable Powder, U.S. Hay, and sink the rest into that up-and-coming Baltimore Opera Hat Company." Previously having inquired how his shares of "Confederated Slave Holdings" were doing.
  • In one of his speeches, Burns made references to Louise Brooks, "the silent star of Lulu" {1929 Movie}.
  • He is not aware that "there's a New Mexico". Since New Mexico joined the Union in 1912 — when Burns was in his twenties — this indicates that he did not gradually lose touch with modern events, but simply never paid any attention to them (or perhaps senile).
  • He thinks that musicals about "the common cat" and "the King of Siam" are unheard of.
  • He is bewildered by the most basic examples of modern technology. In one episode, he mistakes a vending machine for a confectionery shop and starts talking to it. When faced with a sneeze guard in his cafeteria, he is quickly confused and believes it to be "some kind of a force field".
  • He is mystified when Lisa mentions "recycling," which Mr. Burns pronounced syllable-by-syllable ("re-sah-gling").
  • He has at least a basic but solid understanding of phrenology, a discredited field of science which studies the correlation between the shape of the human skull and human intelligence.
  • He appears unaware of inflation, claiming that a nickel could buy "a steak and kidney pie, a cup of coffee, a slice of cheesecake and a newsreel, with enough change left over to ride the trolley from Battery Park to the Polo Grounds."
  • He thinks Collier's Weekly still publishes, despite ending in 1957.
  • He once asked Homer to prepare a lunch for him that consisted of "a single pillow of shredded wheat, steamed toast, and a dodo egg".
  • Though he does not seem to know the dodo is extinct, Burns has a knowledge of other creatures, such as the "Fenway flounder" and the "pocket fox", which have died out long ago.
  • Burns still owns an antique view camera which requires seventy-eight minutes to take a picture.
  • He gave Homer a ticket to the 1939 New York World's Fair.
  • He once mentioned his hatred of Democrats for "letting the Spaniards back in the pantry".
  • Refers to a tape recorder as a "dictabelt".
  • Believes the Packard is new.
  • When entering a strip club, he refers to it as "one of those nude female fire stations".
  • Once claimed Tallulah Bankhead had more sex appeal than modern female movie stars.
  • When asked by Barney Gumble if he was "that guy everyone hates", he laughed and replied "oh no, I'm Monty Burns", unaware of the town's distaste for him.

On the other hand, there are moments when Burns demonstrates knowledge of current events and actual goings-on:

  • He recalls golfing with Richard Nixon, who confessed to Burns about his fears of going to prison after the exposure of the Watergate scandal. However, he then wonders whether Homer (mistaking him for "Homer Nixon") is of any relation.
  • He recalls the Abu Ghraib scandal in a "we can do it better" context.
  • He recalls seeing the Beatles' famous performance on the Ed Sullivan Show.
  • He regaled Smithers with his impression of Elvis Presley and apparently met him personally.
  • He was inspired by the movie Sliver to have hidden cameras installed in every home in Springfield.
  • He cites the movies Bugsy and Working Girl as examples to follow when he films a biography meant to "gloss over my evil rise to power".
  • He apparently knows Jimmy Carter and Ronald Reagan personally, as both attended Burns' birthday party. Carter and George H.W. Bush were denied admittance for being "one-termers", while Reagan can be seen in the background entering the restaurant where the party is being held.
  • He cursed President Gerald Ford for the fictional "Project Bootstrap", which apparently forced Burns to hire incompetent dolts like Homer Simpson.
  • He enjoys Ziggy comics.

It also stands to reason that Burns must have enough awareness to run his massive business empire, as it is unlikely he would allow anyone else to do it for him.

In the Simpsons Comics

In Simpsons Comics #122, it is been revealed that Mr. Burns has a niece called Victoria. In the past, she was a very beautiful girl and at one point visited her uncle Monty in Springfield. There, she met Homer at a diner who had just gone steady with Marge. Victoria immediately flirted with Homer and went out on a date with him. However the relationship ended when Victoria found out about Marge. After breaking up with Homer, Victoria dated a lot of rich guys such as Artie Ziff and has been married a couple of times since. Victoria has yet to appear in an actual episode on the show.

Real life models

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The character of C. M. Burns was originally modeled after Fox Broadcasting Company executive Barry Diller, with notable similarities to Howard Hughes (for example, during a particular bout of eccentricity, he became paranoid about germs, wore tissue boxes on his feet, collected his urine in jars, and built a model plane which he dubbed the Spruce Moose), William Randolph Hearst (indirectly through Citizen Kane), Andrew Carnegie, George Burns, and others.

Real Life C. M. Burns? Multimillionaire financier J. P. Morgan hands out a thrashing

He bears a striking physical resemblance to Fred Olsen, (see comparison: ) the reclusive Norwegian shipping magnate and owner of the Timex watch brand. Matt Groening has revealed that he had problems finding inspiration to the Burns character, but found much help to form him in Fred Olsen, whom came to his attention during a dispute with workers in his american Timex factories.

Harry Shearer originally based Mr. Burns' voice on that of President of the United States Ronald Reagan.

A popular tale in the U.S. Navy nuclear community is that the character was based on Admiral Hyman G. Rickover — for many years the head of the Navy's nuclear program and famous for his eccentricities.

Another popular theory is that Burns' physiology resembles that of the late actor Julian Beck.

Students of Harvard University — many Simpsons' writers are alumni — claim that Mr. Burns' economics and überconservative nature are based upon Marty Feldstein, an economics professor there, or Michael Sandel, a philosopher.

There is a rumor among members of the Sigma Chi Fraternity that former Grand Consul (national president) Dick Hester is the model for Mr. Burns.

Some have also proposed that he is based on John D. Rockefeller, citing Mr. Burns's brutally monopolistic nature and the fact that both worked in the energy industry.

Another theory proposes that Mr. Burns is in fact based on Matt Groening's high school civics teacher, David Bailey, whose physical appearance is very similar to that of Burns. (Rumour has it that Matt Groening did not do well in David Bailey's class, and the two did not get along well.)

Fictional models

His Scottish ancestry - both Montgomery and Burns are Scottish names - may be a reference not only to the common stereotype of 'Scot-as-miser', but to the Disney character Scrooge McDuck (himself a reference to A Christmas Carol's Ebenezer Scrooge; the inspiration for whom was the Scot, Ebenezer Lennox Scroggie). Burns reenacts elements of A Christmas Carol in the episode Grift of the Magi, especially the scene where he brings the Simpson family Christmas dinner, as Scrooge did with the Cratchit family. In addition, he once dismissed a Mary Poppins parody with Scrooge's own catchphrase: "Bah Humbug!".

Burns is also a conglomeration of many villain archetypes. Among the many inspirations are:

  • The Wicked Witch of the West: At one point, he owned a number of winged monkeys, but they were unable to fly ("Smithers, continue the research.") He also has a number of guards outside his mansion who chant ("O-ee-o! o-O!") and perform ritual dances like those outside the Witch's castle in the The Wizard of Oz In one comic, he is depicted as the "Wicked Burns of the West"
  • Emperor Palpatine: Burns carries himself in a similar way, hunched over with arms curled, and the Imperial March from Star Wars has accompanied him.
  • The Grinch: When Burns turned off Springfield's electricity, he was surprised to find the townspeople unbowed and singing. As he put it:
"Look at them all, through the darkness I'm bringing
They're not sad at all. They're actually singing!
They sing without juicers
They sing without blenders
They sing without flungers, capdabblers and smendlers!"

Further, he is said to have stolen Christmas between 1981 and 1985, and manages to do it again in the future ("I miss Christmas," Lisa says sadly).

  • Cruella de Vil: in "Two Dozen and One Greyhounds", his motivation is the same as de Vil's — to make a fur coat out of puppies, (though he prefers greyhounds to dalmatians).

His trademark catchphrase, "Ex-cellent," is an homage to the head Talosian in the Star Trek pilot "The Cage", who would also make the comment on the progress of imprisoned Starfleet Captain Christopher Pike.

Quotes

  • "Excellent...!"
  • "Ahoy hoy!"
  • "Employee of the month isn't all ham and plaques!"
  • "Simpson, eh? I'll remember that name."
  • "Release the hounds!"
  • (While huffing from his ether bottle: "Oh man, that's good E!"
  • "This is America! Justice should favor the rich!"
  • After seeing an ad for Gabbo: "Look Smithers, Garbo is coming!"
  • "Hum...one dollar for eternal happiness... I'd be happier with the dollar"
  • "Smithers! Come quick! There's a rocket in my pocket"
  • "Since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun."
  • "Donuts?! I told you I don't like ethnic food!"

Burns: Smithers, who is that ?

Smithers: That's Homer Simpson sir, one of your drones from Sector 7-G.

Burns: Simpson eh?

Episodes starring Mr. Burns

This is a list of Simpsons episodes in which Mr. Burns plays a substantial role in driving the plot, not simply a supporting role.

Video game appearances

  • The Simpsons: The Arcade Game, where Mr. Burns is the main villain and the final boss of the Simpsons arcade game. In the eighth and last stage, he attempts to destroy the Simpsons using a large mechanical walker, which changes forms as it takes damage.
  • Bart vs The World, where Mr. Burns is the main villain in the "Bart vs The World" video game. In it Bart wins a drawing contest on the Krusty the Clown show with a really poor drawing. The prize is a tour of the world. However, it transpires that Mr. Burns has bribed the judges of the drawing contest and wants to kill off the Simpsons once and for all. He enlists his relatives who live in each country Bart visits. At the end of each country Bart has to battle the relative of Mr.Burns, (who look very similar to Springfield's Mr.Burns). Upon defeating each Burns scion, Bart manages to advance to the next level.
  • The Simpsons Road Rage, where Mr. Burns appears as a villain in The Simpsons Road Rage video game. He appears in the opening and ending cutscenes. In the opening cutscene, Burns is at City Hall, saying that he controls the transportation system. Burns also appears in Road Rage and Mission modes (only in three missions). At Road Rage mode, Burns just said: Gettim, Smithers. After that, he runs off. In Mission 2 in Mission mode, Mr. Burns found out that Homer sneaks out work to watch the game, and plans to sneak back to work. In this mission, put Homer back to work without bumping to Mr. Burns, otherwise, you fail the mission (Mr. Burns appears at anywhere on this mission). In Mission 7, Mr. Burns attempted to destroy the invention did Professor Frink created for solving Springfield pollution and vehicle problems, after he hears the invention. In this mission, as Professor Frink, drop Mayor Quimby off City Hall, but watch out for Mr. Burns. In Mission 10, defeat Mr. Burns by smashing the statues in his garden, otherwise, you fail this mission when Mr. Burns bumps you. In the closing cutscene, after the million dollars is at Mr. Burns' door, Mr. Burns returns the buses, and washes his hands.
  • The Simpsons: Bart's Nightmare, where, in the 'Bartman' stage, missiles fire at Bart from the Nuclear Plant, and clouds of radiation bar the way. Burns is the stage boss, piloting a WWII bi-plane. Smithers makes two appearances beforehand, piloting a blimp that fires large rockets. Burns also appears as statues on the Springfield Empire State Building.
  • The Simpsons: Hit and Run, where, in mission 7 in level 1, Mr. Burns fired Homer Simpson, after he harassed him(But not before he revealed that he had Amelia Earhart's plane shot down. he stated that "That jockey was getting too big for her britches".) In mission 5 in level 7, Mr. Burns gives Homer the map of where the nuclear waste is. Although he doesn't drive any of the cars, two of his cars are available - his limo (driven by Smithers) and the Stutz Bearcrat. You can also enter his mansion on level 4 (and on level 1 if you use a glitch and the Jumping-Car cheat code in-game, but there is nothing in it).


Wikiquote has a collection of quotations by or about: Montgomery Burns

References

  1. The Scotsman

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