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"Kill The Alligator and Run" is the nineteenth episode of the eleventh season of The Simpsons. It aired on April 30, 2000.

Synopsis

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Homer gets a magazine loaded with tests, and gives his friends tests. Later on, he takes his own test and reveals that he will have only three years left to live. He develops insomnia and goes insane. Visiting the power plant's psychiatrist, he suggests Homer go on a long vacation, heading on a trip to a town in Florida. Yet, while the family arrives in Florida, it is Spring Break. Marge wants Homer to stay in his hotel room, but he escapes to party and attend a Kid Rock concert to brighten the last three years of his life. Homer becomes the life of the Spring Break party.

The party is not yet over after the Spring Break crowd leaves: Homer rents an airboat and they go through the swamp, killing the town's most famous resident, an alligator named Captain Jack. The family is arrested for killing the alligator, but they flee from the sheriff and are hit by an Amtrak train, and escape to a restaurant and nearby trailer, where they work in until the sheriff finds them. For what they have done, the family is put in jail and have to go through excessive work. One night they are working, the family encounters the alligator, who is not dead. The family is acquitted, but not allowed to return to Florida again. For their next trip, the family plans to go to North Dakota, the only state other than Arizona (which Homer complains "smells funny") in which they are allowed to vacation.

Trivia

• This episode is frequently cited as the worst ever by fans, and won the worst episode ever list on the NoHomers.net forums twice.
• The episode is a play on the Steve Miller Band song, Take the Money and Run.

Cultural references

• The episode title references the 1969 film Take the Money and Run.
• Homer's line of "Bring on the Rappin' Granny!" is reference to the 1998 film The Wedding Singer.
• The V-Jay death, and the blinking crystal embedded in her hand is a reference to the 1976 film Logan's Run.

Goofs

• After the Simpsons successfully jumped over the railroad crossing, we only see one track and the car landing on the road, not on another track. However, they get hit by another train.

Quotes

• Bart: Here's the mail, Dad. That'll be three dollars for on-couch delivery.
  Homer (paying him): And three makes three.
  Bart: This isn't real money! It's printed by the Montana Militia.
  Homer (threateningly): It'll be real soon enough.

• Homer: Florida?! But that's America's wang!
  Plant Psychiatrist: They prefer "The Sunshine State."

• Charlie Rose: I remember Vincent Canby said, (turning to the camera) "I'm going to kill you, Homer. You are so dead." (Homer screams) Now Chinatown was a classic, but you had problems with the sequel, The Two Jakes?
  Bob Evans: Oh boy. Disappointed? I had the blues like Chasen's had chili. I said to myself: "Evans, you forgot Hollywood rule #1: (turning to the camera) Kill Homer Simpson!"

• Homer: (singing) We built this city, this kick-ass city. What kind of music built this city?
  Lisa: (singing without enthusiasm) Rock and roll.
  Bart: Dad, look out!
  Homer: (singing) Look out for what?
  Bart: (singing) The giant gator!

• (as the Simpsons escape, the sheriff throws his hat on the ground in anger. It magically bounces back on his head with a loud "boing" sound)
  Sheriff: Now, why does that only happen when nobody's lookin'?

• Spring Break Teen: Show us your boobs!
  Marge: Not now!

• Marge: Homer, no! You'll kill us all!
  Homer: Or die trying!

• Lisa: Dad you can't drive without a license!
  (Homer starting the car): I'm going to try it anyway ... it worked! It's a miracle!

• Homer: Okay, non-smoker..add eight years...According to this I'll live to be..forty-two?! Aaooww, that's horrible! I won't even live to see my children die!

• Sheriff: Pullover!
  Homer: There's no good place!
  Sheriff: There's lots of good places! What about over there?
  Homer: No shade!

• Bart: I'm getting used to this country life. Teacher says I'm whittling at a tenth-grade level.
  Marge: And y'all hardly ever bicker any more.
  Lisa: Too hot to bicker, I reckon.
  Homer: You know, killing that 'gator was the best decision I ever made.
  Bart: Got that right.
  Marge: Dern tootin'.
  Lisa: Boy, howdy.

External links

• "Kill the Alligator and Run episode capsule". The Simpsons Archive.
• "Kill the Alligator and Run" at IMDb

• Florida in fiction
• The Simpsons episodes, season 11