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"Hot for Teacher"
Single by Van Halen
from the album 1984
B-side	"Little Dreamer"
Released	October 1984 (US) June 3, 1985 (UK)
Recorded	1983
Studio	5150 Studios, Studio City, California
Genre	Glam metal heavy metal hard rock
Length	3:58 (single version) 4:44 (album version)
Label	Warner Bros.
Songwriter(s)	Eddie Van Halen Alex Van Halen Michael Anthony David Lee Roth
Producer(s)	Ted Templeman
Van Halen singles chronology
"Panama" (1984) "Hot for Teacher" (1984) "Why Can't This Be Love" (1986)
Music video
"Hot for Teacher" on YouTube

"Hot for Teacher" is a song by the American rock band Van Halen, taken from their sixth studio album, 1984. The song was written by band members Eddie Van Halen, Alex Van Halen, Michael Anthony and David Lee Roth, and produced by Ted Templeman. It was released as the fourth and final single from the album in October 1984, and was the final single released during the band's 1974–1985 era.

The song features Alex Van Halen's double bass drum performance, and its music video, featuring the band as both adults and young students. Unusually for a single, it begins with a 30-second drum solo, followed by another 30 seconds of instrumental introduction. The ending of this song comes from a studio demo from the band's club days, entitled "Voodoo Queen".

Musical style

The song has been described as a mixture of glam metal, heavy metal, and hard rock. The song's drum solo introduction composed and performed by Alex Van Halen starts with a speedy double kick drum half-time shuffle reminiscent of drummer Billy Cobham's tune "Quadrant 4" from 1973's Spectrum album, then borrows from the manic boogie rock–style of drummer Simon Phillips on the Jeff Beck song "Space Boogie" (1980) with added tom drums.

Music video

The music video (directed by Pete Angelus and David Lee Roth, and produced by Jerry Kramer and Glenn Goodwin, choreographed by Vincent Paterson with concept/treatment by Anthony Nasch) was filmed at John Marshall High School, with Phil Hartman performing the voice of Waldo, the video's protagonist. Waldo, an awkward boy with large glasses and a bow tie, is put on the school bus by his over-protective mother. He is terrified by the unruly kids on the bus; the driver played by Roth, tells him "si'down, Waldo!" as the opening drums begin. Along with Waldo, the "kid versions" of Van Halen face the trials and tribulations of grade school. Two models appear as teachers in the video, Donna Rupert (1981 Miss Canada pageant runner up), who plays the chemistry teacher, and Norwegian actress Lillian Müller, who plays the Phys Ed teacher. Both teachers tear off their dresses to reveal a bikini, to the cheers of the students. As the kids leave at the end of the school day, the bus driver (again played by Roth) picks them up in a yellow 1932 Ford Phaeton hot rod "school bus," the back of which is emblazoned with "Hot For Teacher." At the end of the video, the kids are shown to have grown up to become a gynecologist (Alex Van Halen), a sumo wrestler (Michael Anthony), a psychiatric hospital patient (Eddie Van Halen), and a game show host (Roth). Waldo's whereabouts and career are unknown but the video hints at him becoming a pimp, the total opposite of his child self. This is intercut with scenes with the band members dressed in red suits and dancing to the song under a disco ball.

An initial controversy arose when the video showed all the band members performing a quick crotch-grab during the "...so bad..." part of the chorus; at first, the 1980s NBC late-night show Friday Night Videos added black-box censor bars to the crotch-grabs but eventually relented and removed the black-box from their video.

One potentially controversial scene managed to go unnoticed for many years, until Angelus unveiled it in the 2011 book MTV Ruled the World: The Early Years of Music Video by Greg Prato: "One thing I remember about that video that a lot people don’t know or maybe didn’t see. When Dave turns into the television show host, we had an idea. I thought, 'You know ... there hasn’t been a really substantial urine stain on MTV. Ever, when you really think about it. So let’s pour a lot of water on David’s crotch. Let’s make it look like he really just pissed himself. And then let’s see if anyone sees it when we hand the video into the record company and MTV.' And nobody did! I know this sounds absolutely pathetic to say, but we probably pulled off the first and most substantial urine stain in the history of television. So we’ve got that going for us."

Reception

Cash Box said that the song "shows at their absolute zenith," saying that "multi-watt voltage surges through this speeding hard rock anthem, with Eddie Van Halen again proving why he is the best."

In 2009 it was named the 36th best hard rock song of all time by VH1. Chuck Klosterman of Vulture.com ranked it the sixth-best Van Halen song, calling it "the encapsulation of almost everything Van Halen is known for, all within the space of five minutes: Athletic drumming, an extended guitar introduction that transitions into a thick principal riff, vocals that are spoken more than sung, two interlocked solos, and lyrics that are technically demeaning but somehow come across as non-toxic and guileless."

Personnel

• David Lee Roth – lead vocals
• Eddie Van Halen – lead and rhythm guitar, backing vocals
• Alex Van Halen – drums
• Michael Anthony – bass guitar, backing vocals

Charts

References

1. ""Hot For Teacher" Anniversary & Fun Facts!". vhnd.com. 27 October 2016. Retrieved October 27, 2016.
2. "Music Week" (PDF). p. 16.
3. ^ Dean, Matt (2011). The Drum: A History. Scarecrow Press. p. 273. ISBN 978-0-8108-8171-6.
4. Popoff, Martin (2014). The Big Book of Hair Metal. Voyageur Press. p. 58. ISBN 978-1-62788-375-7.
5. Rivadavia, Eduardo (November 22, 2018). "11 More of the Heaviest Hair Metal Songs". Loudwire. Retrieved February 27, 2021.
6. Bukszpan, Daniel (2003). The Encyclopedia of Heavy Metal. Barnes & Noble Publishing. ISBN 978-0-7607-4218-1. The album also featured plenty of guitar-dominated heavy metal, such as "Hot for Teacher" and "Panama." which became hits in their own right.
7. Wiederhorn, Jon (January 9, 2016). "Van Halen 1984 anniversary". Loudwire. Retrieved August 11, 2018.
8. Elliott, Paul (November 29, 2020). "Van Halen: a guide to their best albums". Classic Rock. Retrieved October 4, 2021.
9. "mvdbase.com – Van Halen – "Hot for teacher"". Archived from the original on 2018-04-02. Retrieved 2008-10-16.
10. "Hot For Teacher, Van Halen". VH1's Pop-up Video. 1997.
11. "Hot for Teacher" Anniversary & Fun Facts!, Van Halen News Desk
12. Prato, Greg (2011). MTV Ruled the World: The Early Years of Music Video. Kindle Direct Publishing. p. 241-242. ISBN 9780578071978.
13. "Reviews" (PDF). Cash Box. October 27, 1984. p. 8. Retrieved 2022-07-26.
14. "spreadit.org music". Archived from the original on February 12, 2009. Retrieved February 7, 2009.
15. Klosterman, Chuck (October 6, 2020). "All 131 Van Halen Songs, Ranked From Worst to Best A look back at the band's formidable legacy". Vulture.com. Retrieved October 9, 2020.
16. Kent, David (1993). Australian Chart Book 1970–1992. St Ives, NSW: Australian Chart Book. ISBN 0-646-11917-6.
17. "Top Singles - Volume 41, No. 15". RPM. December 15, 1984. Retrieved June 12, 2017.
18. "Van Halen Chart History (Hot Rock & Alternative Songs)". Billboard. Retrieved October 13, 2020.

Further reading

• Van Halen Guitar Anthology. Van Nuys, California: Alfred. 2006. pp. 132–42. ISBN 9780897246729. OCLC 605214049.

External links

• "Hot For Teacher" Anniversary & Fun Facts! on Van Halen News Desk

• Van Halen songs
• 1984 songs
• 1984 singles
• Songs written by Eddie Van Halen
• Songs written by Alex Van Halen
• Songs written by Michael Anthony (musician)
• Songs written by David Lee Roth
• Song recordings produced by Ted Templeman
• Songs about school
• Songs about educators
• Warner Music Group singles
• Warner Records singles
• Speed metal songs